My Musings

My Musings #6: When you tell me I can’t is a sneak peak into my brain and how I operate. While this blog is all about health and fitness for busy professionals, I also like to share about me. Because we’re going to be, if we aren’t already, the best friends ever.

Have you had that moment when someone tells you your goal is impossible or that you can’t do something?

What happens? Do you actually believe them or do you prove them wrong with vengeance? For me, it’s kinda both. I get down and pretty hard on myself at first and think, “maybe I am in over my head. That person knows better than I do, maybe this was all a mistake.” And then after a couple of hours, days, weeks of thinking about it, I see a different possibility. It’s almost like I want to achieve it just to prove them wrong. Because I can never be wrong (hahahaha, I’m wrong so often but finally becoming comfortable with it, you know for learning sake). But it’s always a gut check and makes me question myself. Insert doubt and fear and then inaction. It’s like yo-yo dieting.

Before I started Crossfit, I didn’t think I could do it. It looked so hard and everyone that I’d known at the time (very few people) who were doing Crossfit kept getting into my head and saying, “you’ll die. It’s so hard and you get no reward.” I almost didn’t try it because double, fear, and of course inaction stopped me. But then I friend found a Groupon for a gym in Arizona (where I was living at the time) and really encouraged me to try it out. The rest was history.

When someone tells me I can’t, it makes me think about whether they don’t believe in me or they don’t believe in themselves.

Believe it or not, we often project our own feelings and beliefs onto others and try to pass it off as theirs. When I first quit my job to start EffiFit, there was a lot of negative talk. Yeah sure, I probably shouldn’t have left an income with no real business plan or plan of action. But if I didn’t, I wouldn’t be writing this post right now, and I wouldn’t have learned some valuable things about myself and my belief in myself. I would have left something so important as believing in myself and seeing my own self-worth in the hands of someone else. I wouldn’t have grown as much as I have in the past year and a half, and I’d definitely still be waiting for someone else to see my worth.

You see, when someone tells me I can’t, it then becomes a challenge. Not to that person but to myself as well. Can I actually do it? Hell yeah I can. I may need to figure out how, but I sure can. See there’s no stopping me. I can achieve my goals and reach my full potential. I deserve to, and so do you! It won’t be overnight, it might take 5 years, but it’s going to happen.

Being the somewhat spiteful and petty person I am (fully admitting it, I’m like Walt in Breaking Bad, don’t cross me), I’ll look back on those people and think “yeah I did it, and your lack of belief in me fueled my fire and motivation to do so.” So to you that may have been told you can’t or don’t quite believe you can achieve your goals, use that to prove yourself wrong. Turn that negative energy into energy you can use to achieve your goals, and Get. After. It. I mean don’t because you can’t. (But in reality, I believe in you and all the things you are capable of because that’s where the magic happens).